The Chicken Bush

I bought a chicken bush from a sad lady
At the farmers market by my dad’s house
She had a mole on her ear that looked like an earring
But it wasn’t it was a mole
I informed her that chickens grow in eggs
And not on bushes
I couldn’t stop staring at her ear mole though
So I bought it anyway.

I took my chicken bush home through this alley
Between two abandoned warehouses
A lot of bad stuff happens there
But I like the way alleys make me feel
This old man with a glass eye
Asked me why I had a bush
I told him that it grew chickens
He laughed and winked his glass eye at me.

My Dad was watching one of those
Knock off CSI shows on DVD when I got home
I tried to tell him about the sad lady’s mole
But he kept saying
“In a minute son, in a minute”
And sometimes his minutes can take awhile
So I decided to keep the chicken bush a secret.
I went upstairs

I put my secret in the corner
By my window so it could get some sun
I went to the bathroom
And filled my toothbrush cup with water
Because plants need water.
I decided that even if it didn’t grow any chickens
It would be nice to have a bush
I’ve heard shrubbery is good for the soul

For some reason I just kept thinking
About the sad mole lady’s ear
It was like there was a digital picture of it in my brain
And I kept hitting the magnifying glass with the plus sign
Zooming in until the screen was a big brown blob.
When I got back I saw something on the bush
It was small and pink like a baby mouse
But it was a chicken

I made a shocked face
Like the bad guy always makes on Scooby Doo
Right after they take off his mask.
It was getting bigger fast.
It was hanging from the branch
By that red part on its head that looks like a glove
He looked up at me and said
“You gonna give me a drink or what”

I poured my toothbrush cup into the dirt
Around the bottom of the bush
“I got a mouth” said the rude and thirsty chicken
“You think just cuz I grew on a bush I drink through
This red thing on my head that looks like a glove?
I wasn’t sure if he could read minds
Or if that’s really what he really called it.
So I got him another drink and asked him his name.

He said that it was TJ
And that it didn’t stand for anything it was just TJ
Because his mom was illiterate
I couldn’t figure out how he had a mom
And grew out of a bush
So I asked TJ if the sad lady
From the farmers market was his mom
But he acted like he didn’t want to talk about it

“I’m a Genie” said TJ the chicken bush genie
“And I’m gonna grant you one wish”
I was trying to remember
If I had rubbed the bush
When he told me to “Get a move on”
I had never had any wishes before
But I had seen Aladdin
So I knew all the rules

I thought about wishing for an Xbox 360
But I didn’t because I knew
My Mom and Dad would fight
About who would get to buy me one for Christmas
I would have wished for money or power
But it seems like that’s what the bad guys always do
And then they turn into a red snake
And die or something

Then all of the sudden my dad
Started banging on the door
Like the CSI detective with a drinking problem
“What’s going on in there son?”
TJ looked at me and I looked at the door
I needed a wish and fast
But the only thing I could think of was
That lady with the mole

“I wish that the sad lady from the farmers market
With the mole on her ear
That looks like an earring
But is really a mole
Would have her mole removed
So she won’t get ear cancer
And so that people won’t stare at her
And she can be happy”

TJ looked up at me and I could see
Little tears welling up
In his chicken eyes
He said “It shall be done”
Waved his wings and he disappeared
Just then my dad broke the doorknob
Falling into my room and landing
On my Lego Pirate Ship

“We will have no secrets in this house”
He said as he pulled the pirate flag
Out of the side of his pants
I told him that I bought a plant and that was all
He looked at my bush in the corner
And was relieved that it wasn’t Marijuana
He went back downstairs
To watch other people solve mysteries.

I kept the bush but it never grew any more chickens
I went to the farmer’s market every Saturday
When I was at my dad’s house
For the next couple of month’s
But I never saw TJ or the mole lady again
Every week I would walk home though the alley
And the old man with glass eye
Would laugh And wink it at me.